Frustration

You'll have to excuse me while I deviate from the usually Thursday format. At least, just for now.

This morning, as I was preparing to head out the door for work, I was inspired by a few bars of music. Something random that I had probably heard within the past couple of months, and which had managed to stick for whatever reason. But here I am, searching about the apartment for my keys, and this part of a song crops up.

The song, in a vain attempt to describe music with words, goes something like this:
It's a progression of fifths or sixths walking up a major scale, I think occasionally switching back and forth between the two to keep the major theme going. And as it progresses upwards, the music itself builds and increases in intensity/volume. So at the very end, just before it fades into some minor conclusion, there's the tremultuous peak of pure, solid tone. Of course, me being the nerd I am, this peak made me incredibly giddy when I heard it.

The song seemed to play itself over and over in my head this morning, as if an unknown figure had somehow invaded my brain and quietly placed a looping tape recorder there. Instead of doing what normal people do when this happens - namely try to remember where the song came from - I began to assemble lyrics to the music. The song, as I can now recall my first experience hearing it, has no words. It just has a tone, and from what I could gather from my sluggishly mobilized mind this morning, a feeling of profound emotion.

I can no longer recall those lyrics, although I do remember that the theme of the song was either being 25 or turning 25, reflecting on the previous years, and singing of disappointment to some long-gone girl. I had the powerful urge to somehow record this vague shape of a Billboard-Number-One-To-Be, but being on my way out the door, had no way to do it. And also I didnt have a piano. And also I cant sing.

Which left me plenty frustrated when I finally arrived at the office, unable to get the song out of my head and unable to record it lest I wanted to return to it later. Which is what happened precisely half an hour ago when I 1.) Remembered where the music had come from (a video I had watched three trillion times last semester. It was one of those SWEET HOLY JESUS THIS IS AMAZING videos), and 2.) Remembered I had created a full-on masterpiece of a song out of it this morning. But, of course, I could no longer remember how the song went or the lyrics.

So now I'm sitting here, flustered that I can't remember anything, and sure that whatever remains of my masterpiece that I'm attempting to piece together now is incorrect/doesn't sound the same.

For all you musicians out there, you know that musical frustration is the most mind-numbingly painful thing in the world. Something akin to having a limb removed, if I had to guess...