Thanks for the birthday gift, Commons

A little story for you, as further proof that Maryland loves money:

I wake up the day after my birthday and go through my usual morning checklist: shower, get dressed, eat breakfast, check email, etc. Upon checking my email, I notice a message from the South Campus Commons desk saying I had received a package the day before. Getting any sort of package when you're at school is like winning the lottery, and if it's around your birthday then excitement might as well be oozing out of your pores. So after completing my checklist, I skip down to the desk to pick up my package.

When I arrive and ask for my package, my heart falls a bit when I learn that the package is an envelope. Maybe it's a card? But then why wouldn't they just put it in my mailbox? Is it a really big card? No no, the envelope is normal mailing size, and looks nothing like a birthday card. In fact, it's from South Campus Commons. Did they send birthday wishes?

Their version of birthday wishes, maybe.

I open the envelope and read that I was being charged $10 for checking out a spare key for longer than an hour last week.



When Maryland does birthdays, hoo boy, it goes all out.