Circumstances...

Dear Maryland,

I am sorry. Genuinely sorry. For I have embarrassed you, in front of a Duke student, none-the-less. For such a crime, I should be hung.

The moment of embarrassment occurred under certain circumstances, ones which continue as I type this post. It was not my intention to cause such an embarrassment, I assure you. Yet said embarrassment occurred anyway. I am...very, deeply sorry. The story of such embarrassment follows:

I am at a party. Circumstances mentioned before are evolving quite quickly. This particular party involves a bunch of interns from GE Aviation, all here to progress the aforementioned circumstance. I am...evolving faster than most. The time has come to rotate multiple red injected open *almost* cylindrical objects into a downward position in a particular order to achieve the fastest time. My opponent is the Duke (as I will call him). We smack talk, as expected, but we are respectful (as all Maryland students should be in such an instance). Before the next rotation of objects, I happen to point out that Maryland took home the golden NCAA crown in 2001...

Except not.

I am quite aware now that we indeed did take home the crown in 2002 against the Indiana Hoosiers. In that instance, though, the Duke pointed out to me (with a smile which I so loathed) that Maryland took the crown a year later from 2001, and it was in fact Duke who won in 2001 against Arizona...

Suddenly I have no will to be at this party. How unexpected.

Yet I continue to rotate *almost* cylindrical objects for several rounds longer, and then duck-out to mull over my perilous mistake. I had just embarrassed all of Maryland. I am a failure. I should be shot.

So next time you see me, please punch me in the arm. Enough to leave a red mark for several hours, since I apparently don't bruise (is that even healthy? We'll say yes). I am truly a good-for-nothing, and really don't deserve to attend such a highly-regarded and incredible school.


I am sorry Maryland, for I have sinned against your gloriousness. :(.